I used to have the Ruger P85 and the Ruger 9 mm carbine that shared magazines with one another. The P85 unfortunately has been outdone by many newer-generation 9 mm pistols in my opinion. When Ruger came out with the takedown threaded barrel 9 mm carbine last year I was definitely intrigued, and almost bought one since it could not only exchange with the Ruger P85, but could also be configured to exchange magazines with Glocks, and I have a Glock.
I didn't wind up doing that because of the expense, and wound up getting the Kel-Tec SUB-2000 which also can share magazines with the Glock. I'm happy with it, no malfunctions, and it seems well-made, but it is more of an 'emergency' gun than a 'plinking' one, and for an inexperienced spouse I think having a 'plinking' one would mean he/she gets more practice time, and would do better with it if a problem occurred.
A person used to normal guns would definitely find a Ruger 9 mm carbine to be much more normal to use than the Kel-Tec SUB-2000, and I don't think it would be hard to handle for a petite person, being pretty much the same size as a Ruger 10/22, although slightly heavier. There's basically no recoil. The thought of being able to slip in a 33 round Glock magazine is kind of nice, but you can do that with a Kel-Tec Sub-2000 as well.
The Kel-Tec is very well made and a perfect camp/truck/survival gun. It isn't a 'traditional-looking' gun like the Ruger though, if that is a factor.
The other pair I have is a double stack 45 ACP in the form of a Para-Ordnance p14, and a Mech Tech 'upper' that replaces the slide on a donor pistol. For the donor I got a used Rock Island double stack 45 that uses the same magazines. The standard 14 Round magazines work, but there are very good quality 20 round magazines available, and
20 rounds of 45 ACP is a lot of firepower....! The Mech Tech looks somewhat like the Kel-Tec Sub-2000, in that it doesn't really look like a blued steel and wood firearm, but it is intuitive to use and has of course the same controls as the pistol since it is simply added to a pistol. I don't think the Mech Tech has much recoil, but obviously a 45 ACP handgun does, at least to petite or new shooters.
https://levergunscommunity.org/viewtopi ... =1&t=62454
Bottom line I think would be if money were no object I would probably opt for the Ruger 9 mm takedown carbine, (especially since I have a suppressor). I would probably pair it with a Glock but I think it comes with other branded magazine wells (S&W ? Beretta ?). There may be some non-takedown ones on the used market for a little less money, without the threaded muzzle. The only downside to that pairing would be the cost, plus if you don't like Glocks or the other options that would share magazines, that could be a limitation.
If heavier power is desired, I would go for the Mech Tech and a double stack 45 1911 (they make em in 10mm as well

), as long as anyone shooting it would be comfortable with the higher noise and recoil of the 45 ACP (or 10mm).
And if keeping costs down was important, or light weight or compact storage were goals, and the compatible magazine pistols pairing up with the Kel-Tec SUB-2000 are not a problem, that would be a good way to go. Mine has been reliable, and I think it is well made for a skeletonized 'survival carbine' type gun.
I have posted about the Mech Tech -
viewtopic.php?f=1&t=62454
Website -
https://mechtechsys.com