HUMOR - one answer to a stupid question

[bdhold]

borrowed from a friend on another board

Stupid question thread
I was going to ask if people ask stupid questions everywhere, but that would be another stupid question.

A guy I know went to Wal-Mart today, and he posted his experience. Thought I'd share it.

I was at Walmart, buying a bag of Purina dog chow for my dog, in the check-out line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog. Why else would I be buying dog chow, RIGHT???
So on impulse, I told her that I didn't have a dog, but I was starting the Purina Diet again & that I probably shouldn't because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in intensive care, with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a Perfect Diet and all you do is load your pockets with Purina Nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff a poodle's butt and a car hit me. I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard. Better watch what you ask me and be prepared for my answer. I have all the time in the world to think what to say.

[DixieBoy]

Well, I thought it was funny. Especially the last part. - DixieBoy

[gamekeeper]

[Pete44ru]

Another question: Are you crazy ? . .

.

[Loke]

Did he really lose 50 pounds? It sounds like something I might want to try. I've got about 30 that I need to drop.

[Pitchy]

don`t get me started about people at walMart

[yooper2]

Now that's a good one!

[bdhold]

borrowed from Mad Magazine's 1001 Snappy Answers to Stupid Questions

Q: Did you catch that fish?
A: No, I talked him into giving himself up.
A: No, I was sitting here minding my own business when the crazy thing jumped into my pail.
A: No, it's a plastic model to get people like you to start fascinating conversations.

Q: (from a waiter, to a husband and wife) Table for how many?
A: A hundred and twelve -- we like to change seats every few minutes.
A: One -- my wife will sit on my shoulders.
A: I don't know -- I can't count that high, either.

[Rusty]

I went to Wal Mart the Friday before Christmas and the girl kept trying to scan the divider you put down to separate the orders on the belt. She looked at me and asked if I remembered how much theses things were? I said no, but never mind I changed my mind I'll get one after they put them on sale after Christmas.

[jeepnik]

I went to Wal Mart the Friday before Christmas and the girl kept trying to scan the divider you put down to separate the orders on the belt. She looked at me and asked if I remembered how much theses things were? I said no, but never mind I changed my mind I'll get one after they put them on sale after Christmas.

She's probably just working there until she get on with the TSA.

[Batman1939]

Really appreciate the humor guys. My wife also is going to love the first one--she was lab analyst in the big Purina Factory here.

[rjohns94]

[1894c]

that's funny--real funny--almost choked on my ice tea--left some random DNA sample on my computer screen... :)

[Ysabel Kid]