humor-the Bible salesman
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humor-the Bible salesman
A man went to a store front where there was a sign that said "salesman wanted!" He talked to the manager and said I-I-I'm h-h-here ab-b-bout the j-job for a-a-a, salesman. The manager said hey buddy I know you need a job but this is a sales job where you have to talk to people. The man replied y-y-yes s-sir b-but I h-have to f-feed my family. The manager said OK I'll tell you what, here are five family Bibles. If you want the job you go sell these and when these are gone you come back and I'll give you some more to sell. The man was so happy he said y-y-yes s-s-sir I w-w-will.
In about 40 minutes the stuttering salesman was back and he said to the manager I-I-I n-need more B-B-Bibles. The manager looked at him and said in utter amazement you sold all those Bibles already? the man said y-y-yes sir. The manager said WOW! I don't under stand that, my best salesman doesn't do that good with his years of experience. Tell me how you do it. the salesman says well, I-I-I knock on t-t-the door and I s-s-say, I h-h-have these B-B-Bibles w-w-would you like t-to b-buy one or w-w-would y-y-you like m-m-me to read i-i-it to you?
In about 40 minutes the stuttering salesman was back and he said to the manager I-I-I n-need more B-B-Bibles. The manager looked at him and said in utter amazement you sold all those Bibles already? the man said y-y-yes sir. The manager said WOW! I don't under stand that, my best salesman doesn't do that good with his years of experience. Tell me how you do it. the salesman says well, I-I-I knock on t-t-the door and I s-s-say, I h-h-have these B-B-Bibles w-w-would you like t-to b-buy one or w-w-would y-y-you like m-m-me to read i-i-it to you?
If you're gonna be stupid ya gotta be tough-
Isiah 55:8&9
It's easier to fool people than it is to convince them they have been fooled.
Isiah 55:8&9
It's easier to fool people than it is to convince them they have been fooled.
Re: humor-the Bible salesman
LETS GO SHOOT'N BOYS
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Re: humor-the Bible salesman
I heard Mel Tillis tell that story on himself on the Johnny Carson Tonight Show back in the late '60's or early '70's.
Funny then, funny now!
Funny then, funny now!
Doc Hudson, OOF, IOFA, CSA, F&AM, SCV, NRA LIFE MEMBER, IDJRS #002, IDCT, King of Typoists
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Re: humor-the Bible salesman
Politically incorrect and rude to disparage another because of an affliction over which he/she has no control.
Was only vaguely humorous 50 ears ago.
Was only vaguely humorous 50 ears ago.
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Re: humor-the Bible salesman
257I,
With all due courtesy....please go away.
With all due courtesy....please go away.
Re: humor-the Bible salesman
Are you the humor police or just afraid of fair comment?PaperPatch wrote:257I,
With all due courtesy....please go away.
Re: humor-the Bible salesman
That's funny. But I'm not politicaly correct.
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Re: humor-the Bible salesman
I for one have never found politically correct humor to be very funny.
Doc Hudson, OOF, IOFA, CSA, F&AM, SCV, NRA LIFE MEMBER, IDJRS #002, IDCT, King of Typoists
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Re: humor-the Bible salesman
politically correct is wrong and no fun, the joke was funny
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Re: humor-the Bible salesman
Whatever you do always give 100%........... unless you are donating blood.
Re: humor-the Bible salesman
Do you think it would be funny in your little kid stuttered?willygene wrote:politically correct is wrong and no fun, the joke was funny
It's true that politicaly correct humor tends to be dull. The converse is equally correct -- politically incorrect humor is not amusing and is often downright distasteful.
I like a joke just like everybody else; I favor humor directed at politicians. But I don't favor making fun of people because they bear some immutable, harmless trait. 50 years ago, my mom taught me not make fun of the paraplegic. As an adult, I find no humor in jokes about the blind, the deformed, Catholics, Blacks, Jews and the folk we used to call, 'the retarded'.
As an adult, I find the op joke unmanly, devoid of humorous content and assume its furtherance & long life has been the product of a flawed upbringings.
_________
Did ya hear the one about the guy running for the senate . . . .? :>)
Re: humor-the Bible salesman
[quote="willygene"]politically correct is wrong and no fun, the joke was funny [/quote
Would you think it funny if your little kid stttered?
The observation that politicially correct humor tends to be dulll is accurate. Howver, the converse is equally true --- poltically incorrect humor is not amusing and is often downright distaterful.
I like a joke as much as anyone else; I favor humor about politicicans. 50 years ago my mom taught me not to make fun of the paraplegic. As an adult, I find no humor in making fun of one who bears some immutable trait. I no longer laugh at 'jokes' about the deformed or disabled, Catholics, Jews, Blacks nor about the folk we used to call, "retarded".
I think the joke in the op is unmanly and its furtherance and long life has been the product of flawed upbringings.
_________
didya hear the one about the guy running for the senate . . . .
Would you think it funny if your little kid stttered?
The observation that politicially correct humor tends to be dulll is accurate. Howver, the converse is equally true --- poltically incorrect humor is not amusing and is often downright distaterful.
I like a joke as much as anyone else; I favor humor about politicicans. 50 years ago my mom taught me not to make fun of the paraplegic. As an adult, I find no humor in making fun of one who bears some immutable trait. I no longer laugh at 'jokes' about the deformed or disabled, Catholics, Jews, Blacks nor about the folk we used to call, "retarded".
I think the joke in the op is unmanly and its furtherance and long life has been the product of flawed upbringings.
_________
didya hear the one about the guy running for the senate . . . .
Re: humor-the Bible salesman
That's a good one, wouldn't have been around so long if it wasn't.
Part of what's wrong with this country is how most folks have become so darn touchy feely. "Oh no! Don't say that you might hurt someones feelings!" I for one am sick to death of it!!! Lighten up people, it's a JOKE!!! I'm Catholic, and there's plenty of Pope and Priest jokes going around, but I know they are JOKES, and in no way take it as an insult to my religion. Doubt I would be offended with this joke if I stuttered either. Geez.
Part of what's wrong with this country is how most folks have become so darn touchy feely. "Oh no! Don't say that you might hurt someones feelings!" I for one am sick to death of it!!! Lighten up people, it's a JOKE!!! I'm Catholic, and there's plenty of Pope and Priest jokes going around, but I know they are JOKES, and in no way take it as an insult to my religion. Doubt I would be offended with this joke if I stuttered either. Geez.
NRA Life Member
Re: humor-the Bible salesman
Jeez.. lighten up guy!!
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Re: humor-the Bible salesman
Well, my Daddy was a Bible saleman, and I don't appreciate you making it sound so easy to sell Bibles. He had to work hard to keep us from starving.
SIGH
Funny Joke. I don't believe in sub-classes of people, but a joke's a joke. I think its funny we can have pornography and all sorts of deviance beamed directly into our home for our private viewing via internet and satellite, but in public we're scared to do anything that might possibly not be received well by 100% of the people. A public person loses my faith quickly by apologizing for some "non-offense."
SIGH
Funny Joke. I don't believe in sub-classes of people, but a joke's a joke. I think its funny we can have pornography and all sorts of deviance beamed directly into our home for our private viewing via internet and satellite, but in public we're scared to do anything that might possibly not be received well by 100% of the people. A public person loses my faith quickly by apologizing for some "non-offense."
"Make yourself an honest man, and then you may be sure that there is one less scoundrel in the world." - Thomas Carlyle
Re: humor-the Bible salesman
2571 your just a stick here to stir the pot so if thats all you want to do then be quite you probably wouldn't know funny anyway.
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Re: humor-the Bible salesman
2574,
Read my initial post in this thread.
The first time I heard this joke it was told by a man who actually had a stuttering problem.
For that matter, as a kid I had a slight stutter, but I grew out of it.
I think the joke is funny and if you don't, why did you keep reading after you became insensed?
Read my initial post in this thread.
The first time I heard this joke it was told by a man who actually had a stuttering problem.
For that matter, as a kid I had a slight stutter, but I grew out of it.
I think the joke is funny and if you don't, why did you keep reading after you became insensed?
Doc Hudson, OOF, IOFA, CSA, F&AM, SCV, NRA LIFE MEMBER, IDJRS #002, IDCT, King of Typoists
Amici familia ab lectio est
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Re: humor-the Bible salesman
Guess I read fast. I wasn't incensed -- just commenting that I personally thought it lacked merit as humor.
This string has played itself out. Let's talk about leverguns.
This string has played itself out. Let's talk about leverguns.
Re: humor-the Bible salesman
Maybe it's your profession the makes you lack humour.2571 wrote:Guess I read fast. I wasn't incensed -- just commenting that I personally thought it lacked merit as humor.
This string has played itself out. Let's talk about leverguns.
Did you know that it is 95% of lawyers that get the rest a bad name?
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Re: humor-the Bible salesman
stanforth wrote:Maybe it's your profession the makes you lack humour.2571 wrote:Guess I read fast. I wasn't incensed -- just commenting that I personally thought it lacked merit as humor.
This string has played itself out. Let's talk about leverguns.
Did you know that it is 95% of lawyers that get the rest a bad name?
Now Stanforth, I've always heard it was 98% of lawyers gave the rest a bad name!
Which do you reckion is right?
Doc Hudson, OOF, IOFA, CSA, F&AM, SCV, NRA LIFE MEMBER, IDJRS #002, IDCT, King of Typoists
Amici familia ab lectio est
UNITE!
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UNITE!
Re: humor-the Bible salesman
Moses had a speech impediment which is why his brother spoke for him. Moses did a pretty good job of selling. Get a life- life ain't always fair and we don't always have to "level the playing field" or "spead the wealth"!2571 wrote:Politically incorrect and rude to disparage another because of an affliction over which he/she has no control....
Help your own self, the Government is to busy savin' thierselves.
Re: humor-the Bible salesman
I have a speech impediment, joke made me gi-gi-gi-chuckle out loud.
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Re: humor-the Bible salesman
hey 2571,
did ya hear about the men who were sitting around the campfire passing gas? The only one who found no humor in it ate no beans.
It did him no good to try and convince everyone else how socially unacceptable it was. He only added to everyone's enjoyment. My pop always told me, "son, say your piece and then shut up. you will only hurt yourself if you don't"
did ya hear about the men who were sitting around the campfire passing gas? The only one who found no humor in it ate no beans.
It did him no good to try and convince everyone else how socially unacceptable it was. He only added to everyone's enjoyment. My pop always told me, "son, say your piece and then shut up. you will only hurt yourself if you don't"
Last edited by Scott Young on Mon Jun 14, 2010 6:29 am, edited 1 time in total.
Re: humor-the Bible salesman
Years ago when I was a LEO we had a small (then) airport in our county where would do security off duty. One day a deputy was working a post when a man came up to him in an excited manner and said of-of-officer c-c-can you t-tell me wh-where gate f-f-five is. The deputy wouldn't even look at the guy. So the guy asked him again. Of-of-officer p-p-please t-tell me where g-g-gate f-f-five is. The deputy turned his back and took a long drink of water from the water fountain. Finally the guy walked off to find someone that could help him. A skycap who had watched the whole exchange came over to the deputy and said, hey man what's a matter you wouldn't help that poor guy. The deputy looked back at him and said, y-y-you th-think I-I want to get h-hit in the m-mouth?
If you're gonna be stupid ya gotta be tough-
Isiah 55:8&9
It's easier to fool people than it is to convince them they have been fooled.
Isiah 55:8&9
It's easier to fool people than it is to convince them they have been fooled.
Re: humor-the Bible salesman
stanforth wrote:
2571 wrote:
Guess I read fast. I wasn't incensed -- just commenting that I personally thought it lacked merit as humor.
This string has played itself out. Let's talk about leverguns.
Maybe it's your profession the makes you lack humour.
Did you know that it is 95% of lawyers that get the rest a bad name?
Now Stanforth, I've always heard it was 98% of lawyers gave the rest a bad name!
Which do you reckion is right?
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I was trying to give them the benefit of the doubt.
In my home town there used to be a pub called 'The honest lawyer' The pub sign showed a man in a frock coat with his head under his arm (decapitated)
2571 wrote:
Guess I read fast. I wasn't incensed -- just commenting that I personally thought it lacked merit as humor.
This string has played itself out. Let's talk about leverguns.
Maybe it's your profession the makes you lack humour.
Did you know that it is 95% of lawyers that get the rest a bad name?
Now Stanforth, I've always heard it was 98% of lawyers gave the rest a bad name!
Which do you reckion is right?
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I was trying to give them the benefit of the doubt.
In my home town there used to be a pub called 'The honest lawyer' The pub sign showed a man in a frock coat with his head under his arm (decapitated)
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Re: humor-the Bible salesman
I think I saw a repeat of that; too young to be up that late then!Doc Hudson wrote:I heard Mel Tillis tell that story on himself on the Johnny Carson Tonight Show back in the late '60's or early '70's.
Funny then, funny now!
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Re: humor-the Bible salesman
I LOVE English pub names and signs! They are lots more imaginative and entertaining that the names of American saloons.stanforth wrote:stanforth wrote:
2571 wrote:
Guess I read fast. I wasn't incensed -- just commenting that I personally thought it lacked merit as humor.
This string has played itself out. Let's talk about leverguns.
Maybe it's your profession the makes you lack humour.
Did you know that it is 95% of lawyers that get the rest a bad name?
Now Stanforth, I've always heard it was 98% of lawyers gave the rest a bad name!
Which do you reckion is right?
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I was trying to give them the benefit of the doubt.
In my home town there used to be a pub called 'The honest lawyer' The pub sign showed a man in a frock coat with his head under his arm (decapitated)
Doc Hudson, OOF, IOFA, CSA, F&AM, SCV, NRA LIFE MEMBER, IDJRS #002, IDCT, King of Typoists
Amici familia ab lectio est
UNITE!
Amici familia ab lectio est
UNITE!