And The Cow Jumped Into The Road

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Pete44ru
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And The Cow Jumped Into The Road

#1 Post by Pete44ru » Sat Dec 08, 2018 3:50 pm

.



Late one night, a cow ran out onto the road, and was struck head-on by a limo driving by - so the car came to a screeching halt.

The woman in the back seat, in her usual abrasive manner, says to the Chauffeur, "You were driving, so you better get out and check on that poor cow."

So the chauffeur got out, checked on the cow, and reported back that the animal is dead, but appears to be very old.

"Well", said the woman, "You were driving, so go and tell the farmer in that lighted farmhouse over there what you did."

And so, the chauffer went.

Two hours later the chauffeur returned - totally inebriated, and with a full belly, his hair ruffled, and a big grin on his face.

"My God, what happened to you ?", asked the nasty woman.

The chauffeur replied, "When I got there, the farmer opened his best bottle of single malt scotch, the wife gave me a meal fit for a king, and the daughter made mad passionate love to me."

"What on earth did you say ?" asked the woman.




"Well, I just knocked on the door, and when it opened, I said to them: "I'm Nancy Pelosi's chauffeur, and I've just killed the old cow."



.
IF IN THESE TYMES OF JEOPARDY,
MORTAL PERIL INVADES THY THOUGHT,
TAKE UP THIS TRVSTY PIECE,
TRVST IN THY GOD, AND FEAR THEE NAUGHT.

(The avatar is me, in 1948 ! )

.

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Pitchy
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Re: And The Cow Jumped Into The Road

#2 Post by Pitchy » Sat Dec 08, 2018 4:09 pm

:lol: :lol:
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Nath
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Re: And The Cow Jumped Into The Road

#3 Post by Nath » Sat Dec 08, 2018 4:37 pm

:lol: :lol: :lol:
Psalm ch8.

Because I wish I could!

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GunnyMack
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Re: And The Cow Jumped Into The Road

#4 Post by GunnyMack » Sat Dec 08, 2018 5:04 pm

Priceless!!!!!!!!

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gamekeeper
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Re: And The Cow Jumped Into The Road

#5 Post by gamekeeper » Sat Dec 08, 2018 5:47 pm

GunnyMack wrote:
Sat Dec 08, 2018 5:04 pm
Priceless!!!!!!!!
I agree.… :lol:
From his weapons on the open road no man should step one pace away, you don't know for certain when you're out on the road when you might have need of your spear.
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Ray
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Re: And The Cow Jumped Into The Road

#6 Post by Ray » Sat Dec 08, 2018 10:24 pm

Barry O'Bummer and the Hildabeast were spending the day together circa 2016 to discuss her campaign. Barry picked a french feeding trough so he could show-off his linguistic skills. In almost flawless french he ordered calf brains.

The waiter, an englisher, knowing the brains would be undercooked and remembering the bovine spongiform encephalopathy nightmare of decades past, frantically asked, "What about the mad cow ?"

Barry calmly replied, "Separate checks.....Campaign funds will pay for hers."
m.A.g.a. !

M. M. Wright
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Re: And The Cow Jumped Into The Road

#7 Post by M. M. Wright » Sun Dec 09, 2018 12:15 am

:lol: and :lol:
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