Grandparents

[M. M. Wright]

Are there other Grandparents on this forum who are raising their grand children? A couple of years ago the wife and I completed the hoops to adopt 3 of our grand children. It took 3 years and we're still paying the attorney.
Our son and his wife were druggies and the children ended up in Dept of Human Services custody. They were split up, in foster homes or worse so we did what we felt was our duty and adopted them.
I guess the trauma of midnight raids, being torn from their mothers grasp, and God knows what else is bound to cause some psychological problems. I just pray that the problems are surmountable.
There is a boy 14 who loves wrestling. A girl 10 who loves animals and a boy 6 who loves to hurt people. Yes, they have gotten or are getting counseling. I know it's tiring and we never get enough sleep but it is a labor of love.
I guess I just need to vent a little and am looking for some support from my friends here.

[marlinman93]

Not raising our grandkids, but we've been where you are. My wife and I took in her two nieces about 30 years ago. We had between us 5 kids already; some adopted, some ours naturally. So when her sister had issues with drugs, we went over and talked her into giving them to us. They came with some baggage also, and we constantly dealt with her sister, and her druggie boyfriends. At times I never went anywhere not carrying my sidearm, just from threats of violence.
We didn't adopt, as we had our plate full, but raised them, and still have a very close relationship with them and their kids. They turned out to be wonderful parents, and have never had the issues their mother had. We laugh about how crazy the house was at times with 7 kids all playing, or trying to compete at the dinner table. But they're really good memories today!

[hfcable]

you are doing the right thing, the honorable thing, the labor of love, and i believe and pray that your efforts will be rewarded and that these children will go on a better path. there are a lot of outstanding people in this world who are what they are because of loving grandparents. i can't tell you how much i admire you for this. i hope, and believe, and pray that you and your wife will be rewarded in this world by seeing the results you are working for, and have no doubt that you will truly be rewarded in the world to come.

[Dusty Texian]

You and your wife the Grandparents / now Parents are the best people on this earth to get them children back on track. May God bless you all and give you strenth ! ,,,,,DT

[mav]

Haven't been there. Prayers sent.

[Pete44ru]

.

The pain one sometime goes through, doing God's work, will be repaid a thousandfold in satisfaction and rewards in Heaven.

God bless you fellas & women that take the notion of "family" to heart.

.

[mikld]

God bless you! All you can do is just love the dickens outta those kids. Don't be afraid to grab them up in a giant love hug every once in a while, and tell them they are loved...

(advice from one who never experienced any of the above)

[AJMD429]

Their respect is hard to earn, because they've not been taught what's respectable versus reprehensible.

However, if you are consistent, predictable, and keep the rules simple and consistently enforced, then they will likely learn to respect you and then eventually to emulate you.

Tough road ahead, as you know...

[Booger Bill]

I have found out no family is untouched. Some might say they aren't but I say just wait. After I retired I got in sort of a coffee clutch with some guys I knew on the job, retired LE and everything else. What amazed me almost to a man generally there were similar story's with all of us. Many of them had dysfunctional kid`s or their grand kids living with them. For instance one friend of mine, a retired detective, complained of lending his son his motor home. The kid took it to Mexico and the old man decided to clean it up and found a lot of drugs in the bumper where you store the toilet clean out hose!
Some had either their dysfunctional son or daughter and grand kids living with them. Generally they admitted they allowed it for their wives sake. Another friend, another ex lawman, told me of taking a trip to his old home in Arkansas from California. He frisked his doper son before they left. He said you know, that ~!@#$% was high the entire trip!! I swear, those dopers must have a secret mark on them or give out. One can find another anywhere!
My sister had six kids. Several of them were born challenged. Psycho schizophrenic or whatever. My BIL died young. I stepped in and took care of two of them on and off for many years. I have a hundred story's on that!. One of them died at about 40 years old. At the time he wasn't living with me but I handled his affairs. (Both were living together). What I just want to say is many of us are , have been or will be in similar situations. Many just don't want to admit it.

[rbertalotto]

A place in Heaven has your and your wife's name on it! What you are doing for those kids is amazing. So sorry for your son and DIL's condition. We pray for them.

Do the best you can for those kids, that's all you can do.

God Bless!

[jeepnik]

Thankfully no. I managed to raise two good ones. But you are in my prayers.

[.45colt]

I work with an Old Friend who has adopted His Wife's Grandson whose parents are also chemically dependent. The Boy was born with a rare blood disorder and is in the Hospital for chemo and other treatments every other week. I see every day what a toll it takes on them but the rewards are also great. Their Grandson never whines or complains about anything. But for the Grace of the Lord go a lot of Family's. Prayers Up for Your situation. Jim.

[plowboy 45]

Don't know which one of y'all will get there first, you, your wife, or my MAMA, but if there is a grey haired LADY sittin by the LORD when you get there and she's holding a youngun it'll be a grandmother, and great grandmother, and mostly my loving MAMA
She has raised all her 3 children, widowed by the way, from her young age of 32, all her grandchildren, except my 2, now all her great grandchildren, except my 3 grandchildren
Now by no means am I bragging on my ability on raising children that have done things correctly, and I'm not doggin my brother or sister or their children and certainly not the little fellers that are in the family.
I am however giving you all that have to raise other folks children, PRAISE
I'm 52 and when I fuss at MAMA bout raising all these children, she dang near gets out deddys ol belt and whoops me
LORD, LORD what has this world come to when parents won't raise their own children.
Sorry for these parents that ain't ever gonna take their younguns huntin fishin campin or teachem to cook sew raise their own kids, and most importantly lead them to the LORD
Man they don't know what they missed
Sorry for the long post, but this kinda stuff gaulds my ***
Dope, Dope, Dope, it's a bad problem everywhere
Hope it all works out for y'all
I'll sure say a prayer


PLOWBOY

[JerryB]

I praise the Lord for folks like you that take on what you have done. My wife and I have raised four kids of our own and two grandsons from babies and another grandson son for several years. The second grandson we raised is still with us at 27, married a year that didn't work out. She refused to go to church with him and was no good in general, it takes two to make a marriage work. It is good to have him here to help us. God has really blessed our lives. We have some real loving grandkids.

[2571]

"Allah favors the compassionate." You will be rewarded.

Thank you from all of us.

[Old Time Hunter]

Geez...I am 62 and still have teenagers in the house...if I had to raise my older kids, kids...heck, I would never be able to retire.

My question is this...what does it feel like to be an empty nester?????

[M. M. Wright]

With a 6 year old in the house I doubt I'll live long enough to be an "empty nester" since I'm 76 now. Happily I've a young wife but the stress is really beginning to tell on her.

[JerryB]

Don't reckon I could care about blessings from allah, because My GOD in heaven that created this world gives me many more blessing than I deserve.
My wife and I have had kids in the house for awhile, our first one was born in 1961 and we still have a grandson living at home that is a blessing to have the way he helps out. At 77 I don't know what it would be like by our self.
I do believe our Lord will take us out of here before much longer.

[2571]

God, Allah, Yaweh, Jehova are all names for the same supreme being. A rose by any other name smells as sweet.

Your response provides great insight into your personality and your family relations.

[boolitshooter]

2571,
I believe what you said is uncalled for. This is a forum for gentlemen and women.
Keep your personal thoughts to yourself. Allah is not a Christan term, and NOT God.

[Tycer]

http://www.vitacost.com/gaia-herbs-adre ... nal+health

Try one bottle. First on you and your wife. Two or three, AM and PM. They are nothing short of a gift from the Lord.

[Canuck Bob]

You are living examples of God's Will in action. My circumstances are slightly different. We adopted two girls from China later in life. I'm 62 and they are 12 and 14.

My uncle adopted his grandkids out of a drug infested life on a reserve. It was challenging but those kids are successful adults with loving families today.

God Bless!

[EdinCT]

My Wife and I have my Daughter and 3 year old Grand Daughter living with us for 3 years now. I find much joy in having my Grand Daughter here and while it was supposed to be a place to stay while grad school debt was paid down I am starting to feel a bit like a enabler. But we know who is doing her daycare US!
Now We just found out my youngest Son's wife has filed for divorce (not with out some reason)and he asked if his wife would give his son up would we raise him. We said yes but will need Gods strength if it comes to pass.

[ndcowboy]

Our pastor calls what you are doing "Being Jesus with skin on." God Bless you and your wife.