ot humor YOUR DUCK IS DEAD
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ot humor YOUR DUCK IS DEAD
Your Duck is Dead--
A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon. As she laid her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird's chest.
After a moment or two, the vet shook his head and sadly said, "I'm sorry, your duck, Cuddles, has passed away."
The distressed woman wailed, "Are you sure?"
"Yes, I am sure. Your duck is dead," replied the vet..
"How can you be so sure?" she protested. "I mean you haven't done any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something."
The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room. He returned a few minutes later with a black Labrador Retriever. As the duck's owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He then looked up at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head.
The vet patted the dog on the head and took it out of the room. A few minutes later he returned with a cat. The cat jumped on the table and also delicately
sniffed the bird from head to foot. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly and strolled out of the room.
The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this is most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck."
The vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and produced a bill, which he handed to the woman..
The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill. "$150!" she cried, "$150 just to tell me my duck is dead!" The vet shrugged, "I'm sorry. If you had just taken my word for it, the bill would have been $20, but with the Lab Report and the Cat Scan, it's now $150."
A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon. As she laid her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird's chest.
After a moment or two, the vet shook his head and sadly said, "I'm sorry, your duck, Cuddles, has passed away."
The distressed woman wailed, "Are you sure?"
"Yes, I am sure. Your duck is dead," replied the vet..
"How can you be so sure?" she protested. "I mean you haven't done any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something."
The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room. He returned a few minutes later with a black Labrador Retriever. As the duck's owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He then looked up at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head.
The vet patted the dog on the head and took it out of the room. A few minutes later he returned with a cat. The cat jumped on the table and also delicately
sniffed the bird from head to foot. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly and strolled out of the room.
The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this is most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck."
The vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and produced a bill, which he handed to the woman..
The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill. "$150!" she cried, "$150 just to tell me my duck is dead!" The vet shrugged, "I'm sorry. If you had just taken my word for it, the bill would have been $20, but with the Lab Report and the Cat Scan, it's now $150."
LETS GO SHOOT'N BOYS
- Rimfire McNutjob
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Re: ot humor YOUR DUCK IS DEAD
Brutal.
... I love poetry, long walks on the beach, and poking dead things with a stick.
- Borregos
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Re: ot humor YOUR DUCK IS DEAD
Oh dear!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Pete
Sometimes I wonder if it is worthwhile gnawing through the leather straps to get up in the morning..................
Sometimes I wonder if it is worthwhile gnawing through the leather straps to get up in the morning..................
Re: ot humor YOUR DUCK IS DEAD
But....how could the dog or cat know?
The Rotten Fruit Always Hits The Ground First
Proud Life Member Of:
NRA
Second Amendment Foundation
Citizens Committee For The Right To Keep And Bear Arms
DAV
Proud Life Member Of:
NRA
Second Amendment Foundation
Citizens Committee For The Right To Keep And Bear Arms
DAV
- deerwhacker444
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Re: ot humor YOUR DUCK IS DEAD
Can't believe I didn't see that coming......
"If ever a time should come, when vain and aspiring men
shall possess the highest seats in Government,
our country will stand in need of its experienced patriots
to prevent its ruin." Samuel Adams
shall possess the highest seats in Government,
our country will stand in need of its experienced patriots
to prevent its ruin." Samuel Adams
Re: ot humor YOUR DUCK IS DEAD
There's a lot more people not seeing that coming right now
thanks for some good meds
thanks for some good meds
-
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Re: ot humor YOUR DUCK IS DEAD
deerwhacker444 wrote:Can't believe I didn't see that coming......
me either!
I was expecting a big fee for second and third expert opinions
Doc Hudson, OOF, IOFA, CSA, F&AM, SCV, NRA LIFE MEMBER, IDJRS #002, IDCT, King of Typoists
Amici familia ab lectio est
UNITE!
Amici familia ab lectio est
UNITE!
-
- Levergunner 2.0
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Re: ot humor YOUR DUCK IS DEAD
Don't screw with a good story!BlaineG wrote:But....how could the dog or cat know?
- Ysabel Kid
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Re: ot humor YOUR DUCK IS DEAD
I didn't see it coming either, funny!
Re: ot humor YOUR DUCK IS DEAD
I wonder if it has to be a black lab....
The Rotten Fruit Always Hits The Ground First
Proud Life Member Of:
NRA
Second Amendment Foundation
Citizens Committee For The Right To Keep And Bear Arms
DAV
Proud Life Member Of:
NRA
Second Amendment Foundation
Citizens Committee For The Right To Keep And Bear Arms
DAV
Re: ot humor YOUR DUCK IS DEAD
affirmative
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