Respectfully Submitted

[Bronco]

As I see it there has been two sides of the recent issues here; with respect to how we talk to each other here! Those who see something wrong and those who have seen nothing! The few times I have felt I was talked to rather harshly, I asked to responder to clarify and they were kind enough to explain more gently stating no offense was intended. I guess I am overly sensitive sometimes!
That being said and moving forward.
This is a great place. We are all different ! Some have a vast more knowledge than others! We all should talk to each other with respect, differ in opinions without any demeaning replies and if felt slighted, politely ask for an explanation of the problem.
I think that if we were more aware of some that are more easily offended and talk more respectfully, this forum would be even greater!
This post was intended to help smooth things over and get it back to running like greased rails.
I would suspect that here are some who will feel that even this post is inciting discord, not my intention at all. In fact quite the opposite!
John

[gamekeeper]

Well said Bronco.

[piller]

Nothing wrong with what you said.

[Pete44ru]

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I agree...…


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[FWiedner]

Nothing wrong with this idea.

Mutual respect is never a bad thing, but two different men can have two different points of view. What's intolerably disrespectful to one man can be seen a friendly poke in the ribs to another.

So what can you do? In the rush to "Get over it", there are those who's first instinct is to pet 'em and say "Awww... It'll be alright, Honey", and then there are those that want to poke 'em with a stick see if they can get another jump out of 'em.

Some folks are more sensitive than others, that's a given.

Problem is that in this modern world you will inevitably encounter those few who are just looking for something to be offended about.

They exist. Even here.

[AJMD429]

Problem is that in this modern world you will inevitably encounter those few who are just looking for something to be offended about.

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I'm really OFFENDED that you'd say such a thing....!

Huff....

Puff....

Sigh....

Wink....


On a more SERIOUS note though - it would do us all good to remember that sometimes a person is undergoing lots of stress that isn't apparent to the rest of us, and they may sometimes be near the breaking-point, due to finances, marriage issues, job issues, workplace politics, or whatever......

So when someone is 'offended' there can be a few reasons:

1. The offense was real and undeserved - not too likely on this forum, but some of us are more 'direct', so it happens...

2. There was a 'direct' response that caused some 'collateral damage' in that it was intended towards an individual or group that the offended person might not even have been a member of...

3. The offended individual was indeed the target, and yet the insult was more perceived than intended. THIS is the case most often due to the absence of 'nuance' with text and web formats versus the face-to-face encounter where there are winks and nods and elbows to indicate sarcasm and so on.

In my medical practice, when someone is more easily 'offended' than usual, that is a CUE to me that perhaps something is going on in that person's life that is causing extra stress, and perhaps I need to ask some more questions, and see how I can help them.

So.............when someone here is in a huff about something, either they are indeed turning 'snowflake' on us, and may need an intervention for that........OR.........they may be having more personal stresses that we aren't privy to, and perhaps we need to give them a bit of a break, and/or those of us close to them might want to reach out and see if there is anything we can help with.

Levergunners aren't normally 'snowflakes', so I'm guessing that most of the time when someone here is feeling picked-on, they may need someone close to them to help them over some hurdle in life.

We should always be glad to do that if called upon; we are ultimately all on the same side of things.

[Griff]

I think I agree with Doc. A hint: sometimes it's therapeutic to type out a snarky response, then delete it!

[Tycer]

And sometimes there are winey beaches that are tiresome to visit regardless of why or what made them that way. We’ve all got our demons and it’s not your responsibility to fix mine. If I cannot keep my poop within the boundaries of general banter then a break I should take. No harm no foul. I’ll try not to go out a wine soaked beach. If I fail, please forgive me. See y’all soon with a more inland attitude. All are welcome here.

[marlinman93]

And maybe, just maybe....if the discussion was guns there wouldn't be all this stuff happening? Just a thought.

[Pitchy]

Wasn`t going to say anything but seems the few are trying to justify they`er actions with more BS.
Why can`t the four or five opoligize to the board for they`er actions, i did and did nothing wrong.
It matters not why a person feels bad by what someone says there shouldn`t be any attacks on anyone.
Keep it and it will be a board of five, i have people around me that have caused grief for me and Norma that come up with excuses after axcuses for why the say what they say.
I`m beginning to think we`re dealing with a bunch of Dems.
Attack all ya want, as Monty said your don`t know how little i care.

[Blaine]

And maybe, just maybe....if the discussion was guns there wouldn't be all this stuff happening? Just a thought.

Pay a visit to the newest forum on the internet: The Gun Room Moderated by a great fella that has to use another guy's account for "some reason or other", and makes fun of people of faith, and anyone that disagrees with him

[Sarge]

I post here about once every 14th second blue moon in a month; usually about guns and to make sure Jim Taylor isn't in trouble

[AJMD429]

I know I missed the drama, but if this is going to boil down between picking sides of Pitchy vs Sixgun, I ain't playin'...

I enjoy posts by both of 'em, and sometimes both of 'em (just like pretty near everyone else on the forum) might say something I find annoying, offensive, or insulting to me personally, or to others.

When that happens......I go on about my life, with no panties in a wad, no ulcers, and no whining to moderators or anyone else on the forum.

People are all different, and nearly all of us have some part of our personality that is annoying. Some have that part buried deep, and you really have to intentionally look for it. Some wear it on the outside like skin.

That's just life. Neither way of being is 'good' or 'bad'; it's just being 'people'.

In the same way, some people have their feelings well protected and some right on the surface and vulnerable. When you get combinations of people where everything is buried, things can get really confusing before anyone realizes what's going on, and where you get groups of people where everything is on the surface, it seems like everybody's feelings are going to be hurt all the time.

Again, that's just the way the world works.

I ain't pickin' sides, cuz there is no reason for all the drama in the first place. If you don't like what someone says, quit paying attention to them. No need for a big war over that kind of nonsense; if we all were to start feuding every time someone insulted someone, or called them a name, or disrespected them, or was rude to them, we'd do nothing but fight, and that's a stupid waste of time...!

[Pitchy]

I don`t want this to be about me and Six there`s plenty of blame to go around.
I consider everyone a friend lets all just try and get along and get the board back to normal, there`s enough stress in the world.

[Bronco]

I had no idea the a simple call for respectful dialogue would have such depth, breadth, width and get convoluted! I am amazed!

[marlinman93]

I had no idea the a simple call for respectful dialogue would have such depth, breadth, width and get convoluted! I am amazed!

No surprise to me. Ask for a dialogue that is about respect, and expect it to go either way. That's called opening a can of worms.

[mikld]

I've been on gun/reloading forums since '08 and the largest area for misunderstanding is the written word. You can't see the face of the responder when you read his "attack" or "offensive" comment. There are more than one or two ways to take a comment, as we can't hear the feller's voice nor see if the "bad" comment comes out of a smiling face. I've been in arguments in a forum and try to make myself clear as the intent of my comments, so there is no mistake. If I think the feller is a jerk, I'll make sure I let him know what I think, and it's not difficult to do so without name calling or cussing. Also if I make a sorta ironic/satirical statement, I'll try and make sure the person I writing to understands. Most of the time a statement is written and you just gotta read the black parts and not the white stuff between the lines.

Besides how can one really know a forum member even if they have corresponded with them on line for years? A very kind, loving gentleman can come off as a total jerk, because of the way he writes. Ande even the opposite is true; a jerk can write like a knowledgeable preacher.

I can't make any suggestions on forum etiquette, but I don't get emotional about anything I read (except The Scriptures)...

[FWiedner]

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We're gonna need another stick...

[horsesoldier2019]

The tongue is the hardest muscle to control. To many times we speak before we think. Going through an issue at work related to this very issue. May the good Lord bless us all with greater discretion.