Father O'Malley

[Old No7]

With all the craziness and issues in this world, we all need a little humor to get by...

Old No7

Father O'Malley

One time Father O'Malley was visiting New York City.

He made the mistake of renting a car and trying to drive around town and ended up rear ending a lady.

The police were called and officer Patrick O'Sullivan responded.

Officer O'Sullivan, also an irishman who had just recently immigrated, took one look at the accident, pulled out his notebook and said...

"So father, how fast was she goin' when she backed into ye?"

= = = = =

Months later, Father O'Malley had a minor fender bender with Rabbi Cohen in the middle of a very busy intersection at rush hour. The two clerics surveyed the damage to each vehicle and decided not to move their vehicles until a policeman told them it was OK. Rabbi Cohen seemed very agitated by all the horns blowing and drivers yelling at them.

Father O'Malley, while removing a flask from his vestment, said: "Rabbi Cohen, I think a wee dram might calm our nerves at a time like this, will you join me?"

Rabbi Cohen: "Yes indeed and thank you Father." as he took a large swallow. Then another.

Father O'Malley returned the flask back to its place.

Rabbi Cohen: "Why Father, aren't you going to join me?"

Father O'Malley: "Oh, sure, sure I will -- Just as soon as the police leave."

= = = = =

Father O'Malley moved down to TX and rose from his bed one morning. It was a fine spring day in his new San Antonio, Texas mission parish. He walked to the window of his bedroom to get a deep breath of the beautiful day outside.

He then noticed there was a donkey lying dead in the middle of his front lawn, so he promptly called the local police station.

The conversation went like this:

"Good morning. This is Sergeant Mills. How might I help you?"

"And the best of the day te yerself Sargeant. This is Father O'Malley o'er at St. Ann's Catholic Church. There's a donkey lying dead in me front lawn -- and would ye be so kind as to send a couple o'yer lads o'er to take care of the matter?"

Sergeant Mills, considering himself to be quite a wit and recognizing the foreign accent, thought he would have a little fun with the good father, replied, "Well now Father, it was always my impression that you people took care of the last rites first..."

There was dead silence on the line for a moment.......

Then Father O'Malley replied: "Aye, 'tis certainly true, 'tis true that; but we are also obliged to notify the next of kin first -- which is the reason for me call today."

= = = = =

[crs]

Thanks.

[Blaine]

Next of kin first.... OMGosh....

[Ysabel Kid]

I love these jokes!