Puns From The Past

[Pete44ru]

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SIGN IN A SHOE REPAIR STORE IN VANCOUVER READS:

We will heel you.
We will save your sole.
We will even dye for you.



SIGN ON A BLINDS & CURTAINS TRUCK: Blind man driving.

SIGN AT A GYNECOLOGIST'S OFFICE: "Dr. Jones, at your cervix."

SIGN IN A PODIATRIST'S OFFICE: "Time wounds all heels.

SIGN ON A SEWAGE TRUCK: "Yesterday's Meals on Wheels."

SIGN AT AN OPTROMITIST'S OFFICE: "If you don't see what you're looking for, You've come to the right place".

SIGNS ON PLUMBER'S TRUCKS:

"We repair what your husband fixed."

"Don't sleep with a drip - Call your plumber".



SIGN AT A MILWAUKEE TIRE SHOP: "Invite us to your next blowout.

SIGN ON AN ELECTRICIAN'S TRUCK: "Let us remove your shorts.

A NON-SMOKING AREA SIGN: "If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and will take appropriate action.

A MATERNITY ROOM DOOR SIGN: "Push. Push. Push."

SIGN AT A CAR DEALERSHIP: "The best way to get back on your feet is to miss a car payment.

SIGN OUTSIDE A MUFFLER SHOP: "No appointment necessary. We hear you coming.

SIGN IN A VETERINARIAN'S OFFICE: "Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!

SIGN AT A LOCAL ELECTRIC COMPANY:

"We would be delighted if you send in your payment on time.
However, if you don't, YOU will be de-lighted."

A RESTAURANT WINDOW SIGN: "Don't stand there and be hungry; come on in and get fed up.

A FUNERAL HOME SIGN: "Drive carefully. We'll wait.

PROPANE FILL STATION SIGN: "Thank Heaven for little grills.

SIGN INSIDE A CHICAGO RADIATOR SHOP: "Best place in town to take a leak.


And the best one for last:


ON ANOTHER SEWAGE TRUCK:

"Caution - This Truck is full of Political Promises"



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[kaschi]

Those are pretty good! Here's one more for your list.
On the bumper sticker of a hillbilly's truck: Illiterate? Write for help.

[piller]

Those are all good.

[Tycer]

Sign above the toilet at my friend’s sign shop:
We aim to please
You aim too please.

[Old No7]

Sign from my Dad's lock shop...

"Our Credit Manager is Helene Waite...

If you want credit, GO TO HELENE ......."

Old No7

[Mainehunter]

Another for the Septic Truck:

We're #1 in the #2 business!….

[3leggedturtle]

On a water well truck:
Need a drilling? I’m a willing! Todd/3leg

[fatboy]

Psychic Wanted: You know where to apply.

bob