The Wife Has Gone Missing

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BlaineG
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The Wife Has Gone Missing

#1 Post by BlaineG » Sun Sep 03, 2017 12:47 pm

Husband: My wife is missing. She went shopping yesterday and has not come home...
Sergeant at Police Station:
What is her height?
Husband:
Gee, I'm not sure. A little over five-feet tall.
Sergeant:
Weight?
Husband:
Don't know. Not slim, not really fat.
Sergeant:
Color of eyes?
Husband:
Sort of brown I think. Never really noticed.
Sergeant:
Color of hair?
Husband:
Changes a couple times a year. Maybe dark brown now. I can’t remember.
Sergeant:
What was she wearing?
Husband:
Could have been pants, or maybe a skirt or shorts. I don't know exactly.
Sergeant:
What kind of car did she go in?
Husband:
She went in my Jeep.
Sergeant:
What kind of Jeep was it?
Husband:
It's a 2010 Rubicon with Sprintex Supercharger with Intercooler, DiabloSport T-1000 Trinity Programmer, Teraflex Falcon 3.3 Shocks ,1350 RE Reel Drive Shafts, Method 105 Bead Locks, Toyo 37" X 13.5" Tires, Custom Olympic Off Road Front Bumper, Olympic Off Road Smuggler Rear Bumper with tire carrier, Seward Radius 4s LED Light, Seward 12" LED Light bar, 50" LED Light bar with, sPod LED switch pod with Boost gage,, Rigid LED Lights, 15# Power Tank, Rock Hard Cage, Rock Hard Under Armor, Posion Spyder Sliders, Posion Spyder Crusher Fenders, Posion Spyder Evap Armor, Posion Spyder Extreme Duty Trans-Mount Cross Member, Bushwacker rear armor, 5.13 Gears, Magnum 44 Front Axle, Off Road Evolution "C" Gussets, Cobra 75 CB Radio, Warn 10K on Front and 8K Winch on Rear, Bartact Seat Covers, Delta Quad Bar Xenon Headlamps,Tantrum LED Offroad Rock Lights, Teraflex HD Tie Rod, Teraflex Falcon Steering Stabilizer, Teraflex Alpine Long Control Arms Front & Rear, Teraflex 4" springs, Teraflex JK Performance Slotted Big Rotor Kit, TeraFlex Monster HD Forged Front Adjustable Trackbar, Teraflex Front & Rear Brake Line Kit, Teraflex Bump Stops Front & Rear, Surprise Straps, Hothead Headliner, Teraflex D-44 Diff Covers, Wild Boar Grille, Rigid Ridge Hood, Drake Hood Latch's & a Tuffy Security Drawer
At this point the husband started choking up. . .
Sergeant:
Don't worry buddy. We'll find your Jeep.
As Long As You Have A Sharp Stick, Never Give Up. Take One Of Them With You When They Come For You. :evil:

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Griff
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Re: The Wife Has Gone Missing

#2 Post by Griff » Sun Sep 03, 2017 1:08 pm

I'd probably be a little more clear on the description of my wife... but no less detailed on my p/u! :P
Griff,
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Pitchy
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Re: The Wife Has Gone Missing

#3 Post by Pitchy » Sun Sep 03, 2017 1:41 pm

:lol: :lol: :lol:
Because I Can, and Have
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Old Ironsights
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Re: The Wife Has Gone Missing

#4 Post by Old Ironsights » Sun Sep 03, 2017 4:34 pm

I'm sure that if he had had to pay for any mods to make HER "non-stock" he'd remember all of them too...
C2N14... because life is not energetic enough.
מנא, מנא, תקל, ופרסין Daniel 5:25-28... Got 7.62?
Not Depressed enough yet? Go read National Geographic, July 1976
Gott und Gewehr mit uns!

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2ndovc
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Re: The Wife Has Gone Missing

#5 Post by 2ndovc » Sun Sep 03, 2017 7:05 pm

Old Ironsights wrote:
Sun Sep 03, 2017 4:34 pm
I'm sure that if he had had to pay for any mods to make HER "non-stock" he'd remember all of them too...
:lol: :lol:

jb 8)
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" Tomorrow the sun will rise. Who knows what the tide could bring?"

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Sixgun
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Re: The Wife Has Gone Missing

#6 Post by Sixgun » Sun Sep 03, 2017 7:17 pm

Ain't that the truth. One night about 25 years ago the wife came into the gunroom and asked me if I would know if a gun was missing....let me tell ya, I have a lot of guns.......so......I walked out of the room for two minutes, let her "steal" one and when I walked back in, I knew exactly which one it was in a matter of seconds.........and I have no clue what I ate for breakfast this morning.---6
Move Over All You Puppy AR-15's...The Big Dog Is Coming Through!!
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Ysabel Kid
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Re: The Wife Has Gone Missing

#7 Post by Ysabel Kid » Sun Sep 03, 2017 8:39 pm

:lol: :lol: :lol:
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Old Ironsights
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Re: The Wife Has Gone Missing

#8 Post by Old Ironsights » Sun Sep 03, 2017 8:54 pm

Silicone, $2800...
Paint, $300/mo
Treads... +/-$1000/mo...
Lingerie she won't wear?.... -$3,000...

Sigh...
C2N14... because life is not energetic enough.
מנא, מנא, תקל, ופרסין Daniel 5:25-28... Got 7.62?
Not Depressed enough yet? Go read National Geographic, July 1976
Gott und Gewehr mit uns!

Nath
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Re: The Wife Has Gone Missing

#9 Post by Nath » Fri Sep 08, 2017 5:04 am

Brilliant. Keep them coming 👍
Psalm ch8.

Because I wish I could!

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